Prompt- Write something someone told you about yourself that you'll never forget. Something I'll never forget that someone told me, was that I am a neurotic mess. Up until that point I didn't believe that anyone else saw my anxiety come through. It was around the time that I first had my oldest daughter Mia. A friend came over and saw what a wreck I was just trying to get through all the colic crying and breastfeeding until my nipples bled (I know fun times). My friend didn't realize my social anxiety still to this day makes me replay that scene in my head over and over. Or how much it made me realize that I had to leave my house and do more than just be a mom. To be honest I believe that it's because out of all of the people that I knew who had babies, they all had easy babies compared to mine. My oldest cried all day and night unless she was attached at the nipple. It was like shackles that didn't let me do much for the first few months of her life. But wa...
Loving myself is like opening the fridge and smelling something that is repulsive but not being able to find it. Loving myself is stepping on something damp with socks on. Loving myself is wishing for rain on mars, hoping for snow on a Californians beach, dreaming the final chapter is not the end. Loving myself is growing up a fairly happy child. Loving myself is words hunting me with dulled arrow heads, Loving myself is slowly scraping away my determination to survive. Loving myself is wondering if this is the best lifetime I will live. Loving myself is often dreaming of another dimension, where sadness was just below the surface and tears were just an ant hill, not a mountain to defeat. Loving myself is like crossing the open sea and not expecting to be surrounded by water. Loving myself is an after thought, nothing but pepper and salt. Loving myself is a missed communication. Loving myself is an unsent text message.
Hello world! (insert some other generic introduction) My name is Geneva Johnson, and this blog is about my hot mess of a life. Let's get started, I am a 25 year old mom of two toddlers a fur baby and an over grown child of a husband. I am the all inclusive domestic type, who also hustles as a server on the side. My life is pretty hectic as it is running around, trying to take care of two small humans when I can barley remember to wash my face before bed. I used to be cool kid with aspirations of writing and being someone, now I am the subject of two small dictators, up to my elbows in diapers and asking someone what side would they want with their entree. This blog will be my out let from everyday life. If you chose to follow or read it expect nothing more than random rants, poetry, and possibly some short fiction to help my mind escape. Hope you enjoy!
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